What the counsellor said about forgiveness...
1. First off, forgiveness begins with a legitimate injury. Understanding and being honest is the first step towards resolving issues. Being honest is the first stage towards freedom from past injuries.
2. The second part of forgiveness is that there is no such a thing as getting even. If someone has hurt you, it means you trusted the person. One can never be hurt without being vulnerable. Causing someone else pain does not take pain away; it merely acts as a distraction. Every act of revenge simply buries one's pain. The deeper it’s buried, the more revenge will be required to keep the pain from being felt. The cycle never ends.
3. The third part of forgiveness – and the most important – is that forgiveness means laying down one's weapons. What are weapons? Yelling is a weapon, being aggressive is a weapon. Weapons are things one does to lash out at other people or to “get even” to protect ourselves.
4. Fourth part of forgiveness is recognising that forgiveness is not the same as trust. Many people think of forgiveness as being totally released from hurt as though nothing has happened. Trust is dependent on the person who has hurt you, and forgiveness is dependent on you. Forgiving someone gives the person the opportunity to change their ways; changing their actions is entirely up to the person.
5. Fifth part of forgiveness is that forgiveness means grieving. Forgiveness means letting your hurts die. Another reason we grieve is that we cannot embrace a new future, if we are still holding on to the past. Unforgiveness causes a person to feel that they have to keep their guard up. Until the past injury is grieved, those injuries will continue to block that path. Forgiveness allows the offended freedom to love again and not be bitter and alone.
God first made Man. Then He made Woman to accompany Man. He made Woman from the ribs of Man...
And so, I realise now that only by letting my past go, then that what has happened to me in the past decade will not continue to eat up my future...embracing change and keeping to my principles, following my heart and doing what's right...
Will you walk with me?
2. The second part of forgiveness is that there is no such a thing as getting even. If someone has hurt you, it means you trusted the person. One can never be hurt without being vulnerable. Causing someone else pain does not take pain away; it merely acts as a distraction. Every act of revenge simply buries one's pain. The deeper it’s buried, the more revenge will be required to keep the pain from being felt. The cycle never ends.
3. The third part of forgiveness – and the most important – is that forgiveness means laying down one's weapons. What are weapons? Yelling is a weapon, being aggressive is a weapon. Weapons are things one does to lash out at other people or to “get even” to protect ourselves.
4. Fourth part of forgiveness is recognising that forgiveness is not the same as trust. Many people think of forgiveness as being totally released from hurt as though nothing has happened. Trust is dependent on the person who has hurt you, and forgiveness is dependent on you. Forgiving someone gives the person the opportunity to change their ways; changing their actions is entirely up to the person.
5. Fifth part of forgiveness is that forgiveness means grieving. Forgiveness means letting your hurts die. Another reason we grieve is that we cannot embrace a new future, if we are still holding on to the past. Unforgiveness causes a person to feel that they have to keep their guard up. Until the past injury is grieved, those injuries will continue to block that path. Forgiveness allows the offended freedom to love again and not be bitter and alone.
God first made Man. Then He made Woman to accompany Man. He made Woman from the ribs of Man...
And so, I realise now that only by letting my past go, then that what has happened to me in the past decade will not continue to eat up my future...embracing change and keeping to my principles, following my heart and doing what's right...
Will you walk with me?
Libellés : Miscellaneous, Reflections
posted by Jane Doe @ 7:40 AM
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